Hollywood star Andy Serkis is set play Cuddles the Monkey in a new multi-million pound movie about the life of the late ventriloquist Keith Harris.
Serkis, who is famous for playing on-screen simians such as King Kong and Caesar in the Planet of the Apes reboot series, told a packed news conference: ‘As you all know I love to act the monkey so when I heard a film about Keith Harris was being made I was on the phone to my agent immediately. Cuddles has always fascinated me with his pathological hatred of Orville the Duck and his complex relationship with Keith. I can’t wait to go ape!’
In preparation for the role Serkis has gained permission from the Harris family to have the dead entertainer’s arm inserted into his rectum to get a feel of what Cuddles had to endure.
Serkis said: ‘I’m sure a lot of Cuddles’ anger came from the discomfort of having Harris’ arm shoved up his Aris every time he performed. That’s why I’m going to desecrate Keith’s corpse. The pain he must have gone through is unthinkable. Cuddles truly suffered for his art.’
‘Monkey see monkey do,’ he added for no reason.
The movie is set to be released next year with the proposed title of ‘Waiting to Fly: The Keith Harris Story’.
Veteran porn star Ben Dover will take the title role. He told us: ‘I loved the Keith Harris Show in the 80s and watched it in-between shooting scenes for my adult movies. I’m delighted to finally be offered a serious role but to be fair I think they offered it to me because I really look like Keith.’
It is not known who will be playing Orville the Duck but it is rumoured that American Pie actress Mena Suvari has been approached because she has massive eyes and tragically now wears a nappy.