Brothel opens first self-service checkout

A local brothel is gaining world wide attention after becoming the first of its kind to open a self-service checkout for busy men on the go.

The self-service section will allow men to pay a reduced fee to enter the brothel and pleasure themselves before leaving.

‘There are a lot of married men who just want a little bit of “me time” away from the wife without actually cheating on her. Our self-service checkout will provide a safe space for the busy masturbator on the go,’
said Madame LaCroix, owner of the brothel.

Many sex workers are furious at the move as they say the self-service checkout could cause them to lose their jobs to automation.

But while the self-service checkout has seen an up tick in custom for the brothel, it hasn’t exactly gone as intended.

‘A lot of men don’t seem to be able to use it properly so one of us often has to go over and help them finish off. And the de-bagging area is a constant mess,’ said one working girl.