A local man who believes that ‘women with attitude’ often just need a ‘good, hard fuck’ to sort their heads out has failed his psychology degree, with his thesis having been thrown completely out the window.
Gary Dixon (32) has long held the belief that penis (especially his) has the power to cure women of serious mental illness and disorders. However, his twenty thousand word essay on the subject was thrown out be his teacher who called it ‘rambling pornographic filth’ and refused to even grade it.
‘It wasn’t a thesis so much as a poorly written script for a porn film,’ said Lisa Blackwood, Gary’s teacher. ‘I’d actually like to study him because something is clearly underdeveloped in his mind.’
But Gary isn’t satisfied with his teacher’s findings and believes the application of his theory could completely rid the world of mental illness.
‘There are a lot of crazy bitches out there who just need a good going over. And once that happens they’ll be calm, and that will mean less stress for men which will help their mental problems too. It’s a win/win situation,’ said Gary.
Mr Dixon has now been kicked off his Open University course without a refund.
‘It was that teacher. She had it in for me. Probably just sexually frustrated,’ he claimed.