Man far more concerned with women’s appearances than his own

A man who consistently leaves negative and critical comments about the appearances of women is considerably less concerned about his own appearance, it has emerged.

The man, Mark James, spends most of his time on celebrity websites and social media, criticising famous women for how they look.

‘Miley Cyrus looks like a boy with tits. Kim Kardashian is full of more plastic than a toy factory. Adele has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Where have all the real beautiful women gone?’ These are just three of thousands of similar posts Mark has made recently.

Mark, 36, is currently unemployed, single, overweight and living with his parents.

‘Hey, I know my situation doesn’t look good but I’ve got stuff going on up here,’ said Mark, pointing to his brain. ‘BIG stuff. Only the perfect woman would deserve a guy like me.’

Mark then proceeded to fart, scratch his balls, take a swig of beer and watch the Olympics for the rest of the night.

However life isn’t all good for Mark. Just yesterday he had to block a former school friend who always pointed out his beer-gut in photos on Facebook.

‘It was really rude of her. I don’t need that kind of negativity in my life.’