President Donald Trump is celebrating today after winning the annual White House Easter egg hunt competition for children.
While, traditionally, Presidents only referee the contest, Trump decided to take a more hands-on approach when he entered himself into the field along with thirty children. And with the rest of the contestants only eight years old or under, President Trump swept to a decisive victory, gathering all fifty of the hidden eggs in record time.
After being announced the winner, President Trump sat down the other children and gave them a short speech.
‘You little guys can’t hunt eggs for shit, huh? What a bunch of losers.’
There was controversy surrounding the result of the competition after some parents say they spotted the President walking around with Secret Service protection, hiding the eggs himself.
But those accusations may pale in comparison to the tragedy of the day. In his hunt for an egg, Tommy Belkan, 7, was brutally tackled by the President and broke his arm.
‘That was a valuable lesson for that little boy. You mess with the bull, you get the horns,’ said the President.