Scott Walker to physically separate America from Mexico and Canada

Governor Scott Walker today announced an election pledge to physically separate America from both Mexico and Canada should he become President.

Fox News described the pledge as “taking it up a notch” after Walker had previously expressed a desire to build walls on the borders between America and Mexico, as well as America and Canada.

“It’s time to get tough on immigration. I realize now that a wall may not be enough. That is why I now pledge to completely separate America from Mexico and Canada. It will not be an easy project but by making America a true island we can best protect our nation’s interests. I will do it with my own hands if I have to!” said Governor Walker in a speech in Ohio.

Scott Walker: A man of many ideas.

Scott Walker: A man of many ideas.

Whilst technically possible, the separation of America’s landmass from its neighbors to the north and south would cost $3.7 trillion. However that is a small price to pay according to many of the Governor’s supporters.

“It’s about damn time – excuse my language – that a politician had the fortitude to truly stand up for America. This is the greatest country in the world and I’m sick and tired of my tax dollars being spent on immigrants. If they want a better quality of life they should work for it in their own country,” said Trudy Pullman, an unemployed single mother of three.

The idea is unlikely to get off the ground though as Governor Walker is currently polling at 6.7% of the vote in the Republican primaries, placing him fifth in the running.

The Mexican and Canadian governments have yet to comment on the plans, however it is believed they would both be in favor of putting some distance between themselves and America.