NHS

999 to become a premium rate number

In an effort to increase emergency service funding, Theresa May has said that 999 may become a premium rate number costing users £3 a minute. The Conservative Party believe that the switch would provide much…


Syrians send millions to aid decimated NHS

Syrians living in war-torn conditions have clubbed together to send money, medical supplies and care packages to help relieve the burden on a decimated NHS. It has often been said the people with the least…







NHS to prescribe spanking for constipation

Spanking is better than suppositories at treating constipation, it has emerged. A case study of the Isle of Wight village of Whippingham, so called because of its celebrated spanking traditions, revealed that a sexual diet…



NHS struggling to find staff for some reason

Top sources in the NHS have revealed that the ailing health service is struggling to find staff for some completely unknown reason. With the Conservative government promising a ‘true seven-day NHS’, staffing needs are at…