Boris Johnson has been hit by a wave of depression after the Prime Minister left a note in his lunchbox reminding him exactly who he is.
May, who personally packs a lunchbox for each of her cabinet members, left a personal message for her Foreign Secretary after the pair had yet another falling out over the details of Brexit.
‘Boris has been a bit of a moody bollocks around me lately, so I just wanted to remind him of his position in life,’ said May.
And BoJo, who typically eats his first lunch at around 10:30, took the message hard.
‘The message was very simply and to the point. It just said “You are Boris Johnson”. It’s the most brutal put-down I’ve ever experienced,’ said the former Mayor of London.
However, it wasn’t all bad news for Boris.
‘At least she remembered to put in my packet of Space Raiders this time,’ said a relieved Johnson.