Environmentalist pledges to make her ass emission-free by 2030

An ardent environmentalist has today pledged to make her ass completely emission-free by 2030, no matter the cost.

Dana Shelling, 28, has become the first person to pledge to make her ass emission-free and has given herself until 2030 to do so.

‘This won’t be an easy task but it’s vital for the future of the planet. Methane is a far more potent greenhouse gas than carbon dioxide and I need to take responsibility for what my ass produces,’ Dana told us.

Ms Shelling already recycles, composts her food, avoids air travel and eats a vegan diet; although the latter will undoubtedly cause issues with her aim to stop pumping methane into the environment.

‘I eat a lot of green vegetables and beans so I’m probably gassier than most. I plan to experiment with my diet though while keeping it vegan, so my ass doesn’t destroy the entire planet,’ she said.

She claims that, once 2030 hits, if she feels the need to pass gas she’ll just hold it in, even if it means severe stomach cramps or exploding in a fiery ball of methane.

‘We all have to do out part,’ she told us, solemnly.