Conservatives desperately trying to tempt Keir Starmer into eating a bacon sandwich

Concerned Conservative MPs are desperately trying to tempt Labour leader Keir Starmer into eating a bacon sandwich in the hope it will dent his rising popularity.

With polls showing that Keir Starmer is now seen as more trustworthy and capable than Prime Minister Boris Johnson, the Conservative Party realises that it needs to take action.

Conservative MPs have been spotted cooking bacon outside Keir Starmer’s office, hoping to lure him into eating a delicious sandwich.

‘This is how we got Ed Miliband and it’s how we’ll get Starmer. If he eats it and looks weird then that will scupper his campaign. If he eats it and doesn’t look weird then we’ll say he’s antisemitic for eating pig meat,’
one Tory insider told us.

Keir Starmer seems to have resisted the temptation of a bacon sandwich to date. All that he’s been seen eating in public so far is Boris Johnson’s soul during PMQs.

‘That’s rather impressive as I didn’t even know I had one,’ laughed Boris.