A local man is facing intense pressure after his wife asked him to open a tight jar for her.
The moment that Alicia Green came out of the kitchen with a jar in her hand, Stephen’s heart sank. He knew exactly what would be coming next.
“Can you open this for me?” Alicia asked flippantly, as if she wasn’t putting her husband’s manhood and entire self-worth to the test.
Stephen’s hands immediately began to sweat, not ideal for the task ahead of him. He quickly wiped his palms on his jeans before standing up and taking the jar of pickles in his hand.
“What do you want pickles for?” he asked Alicia, buying himself a moment to steady himself.
“A chickle sandwich,” she replied, the moment quickly over.
With a deep breath, gritted teeth and a silent wish he’d used those grip strengtheners that he’d received for Christmas, Stephen wrenched on the jar lid with all his might.
The sound of an almighty pop filled the room just nano-seconds before a small but potent splash of pickle juice landed on Stephen’s shirt.
“Aww, my big strong man. Thanks, honey,” said Alicia, taking the lidless jar off him and walking back to the kitchen.
“Can you make me a sandwich too?” Stephen called back, his voice full of triumph.
“Fuck off, you sexist pig,” replied Alicia.