17 AD: Jesus pierces his foot on a nail, beginning a lifelong rivalry.

1928: King George is confined to his bed with a congested lung after refusing to wear a mask or get vaccinated.

1963: JFK, the first president to be named after an airport, is assassinated in Dallas, Texas.

1963: Death of Aldous Huxley, writer of the popular children’s TV show “Huxley Pig”.

1975: Juan Carlos becomes the new king of Spain usurping Juan Carder, who was spending most of his time alone in his bedroom.

1990: Margaret Thatcher resigns as prime minister after being offered the top job in Hell.

1992: Sabrina Bond becomes the first woman to be arrested for eating a Yorkie.

2013: God announces his retirement from helping athletes after becoming sick and tired of post-event sports interviews.

2020: Jeff Bezos overtook on the richest man list by a cashier who short-changed a customer by 2 cents.