Prince Andrew has agreed to be stripped, until he realised that people meant stripped of his titles and not by teenage girls.

The Duke of York backtracked on his acceptance of being stripped when he grasped what was actually meant. Never a quick-thinker, this took Prince Andrew almost a month.

‘When one heard that the people wanted one to be stripped, one was all for it. What a great idea, one thought. One hasn’t been stripped by a bunch of teenage girls for quite some time, ever since my dear friend Jeffrey died.

‘Then one realised that the plebs wanted to strip me of my royal titles! Who are they to judge me? There’s more chance of me handing over my hard drive to the FBI than my royal titles,’ said Prince Andrew.

Prince Andrew insisted that the stripping of royal titles should only be discussed when it comes to people who call his family racist.

Unfortunately, we’re unable to publish Prince Andrew’s exact quote on this matter as it contained several racial slurs that would’ve made his father blush.