Queen to have middle finger cryogenically frozen and placed on throne in final FU to Charles

Queen Elizabeth II plans to have her middle finger cryogenically frozen and placed on the throne as one final FU to Prince Charles after she dies, according to our sources in Buckingham Palace.

At the age of 95 and with the prospect of her health failing, Queen Elizabeth II has moved to ensure that she stays on the throne for the foreseeable future through the use of cryogenic technology.

In the moments before Her Majesty’s death, royal doctors will remove her hand and place it in a cryogenic freezer – but not before the hand is positioned to give the middle finger.

The middle finger will be legally recognised as Britain’s monarch, depriving Prince Charles of the position of King.

“We believe the cryogenic freezer could technically keep Queen Elizabeth II’s hand ‘alive’ for up to thirty years, at which point Prince Charles should be dead,” said our source.

If successful, Prince Charles will be skipped over and the crown will go straight to Prince William – at which point humanity should have no longer than five years left on the planet anyway.

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