A local man has sat down to watch “Robin Hood”, a classic horror movie for all right-wing voters like himself.
Norman Bright, 54, will do his best to make it through the entirety of “Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves”, widely considered to be one of the scariest movies ever made for right-wing voters.
“It’s a deeply disturbing psychological horror,” Norman began. “You have an American playing an English icon without even attempting an accent, there’s that horrid Bryan Adams song and there’s even a black man in the movie. I’m not racist but I doubt there were any black men in Nottingham at the time.
“But worst that all of that is the idea of a man stealing from the rich to give to the poor. What a truly horrific thought. Everyone knows the economy is supposed to work the other way around.”
If Norman can make it through “Robin Hood”, he plans to follow it tomorrow by watching “A Christmas Carol” tomorrow night.
“A brilliant businessman is cut down in his prime and turned into a lefty liberal snowflake,” Norman shuddered.