Pop superstar Adele has sensationally cancelled her Las Vegas residency just days before it was due to start after she received a more lucrative offer from Blackpool.
While Adele originally claimed that she was merely postponing her Las Vegas residency, she has since admitted that she received a much better offer from the seaside town of Blackpool.
“If I’m being honest, this is what I wanted all along,” she told us. “I was kind of playing them off against each other. Las Vegas is nice but it’s a poor man’s Blackpool, I’ve always said that.
“You can take your glitz and glamour and throw them in the sea for all I care. What I really want is a donkey ride, some fish and chips and then a quick wade in a cesspool – the same as any other woman.”
Adele will reside in Blackpool for six months, after which she will receive a well-deserved award for bravery.
Her last-second change of heart has left Las Vegas with a gaping hole in its schedule. Upon hearing of a gaping hole, comedian Pete Davidson has quickly stepped forward to fill it.
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