American now considered an offensive term; to be replaced by Person With Americanism

The term American is now considered offensive and will be replaced with Person With Americanism or Little Minded Person, according to the Official Board of Political Correctness (OBPC).

With the usage of the term American increasingly being used as an insult, the OBPC has stepped in to make an important change.

“Many people unlucky enough to be born in America are morons but it isn’t their fault. It’s the system around them.

“What we want to do is change the language being used. Rather than call someone American, please refer to them as a Person With Americanism or a Little Minded Person. It reminds us that there is a human being behind all that ignorance,” said Kenneth Frequency, the head of the OBPC.

Mental health experts have applauded the change as Americanism has long been considered a form of mental illness.

“Symptoms of Americanism include a lack of critical thinking abilities, bursts of rage, hamburger fever, an obsessive lust for anything that can cause an explosion, cleft hips, and impotence in any room that doesn’t contain a star-spangled banner. It’s a serious disorder and it’s time we started taking it seriously,” said psychiatrist Willie Bottom.

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