The smartest kid in school has now aged into a tragic cautionary tale about the importance of mental health, it’s emerged.
Josh Cedar, 27, was one of the best and brightest children at Crusher High School. He studiously worked his way through the years and achieved fantastic exam results at the end of his tenure there.
“Josh was a model student,” one of his old teachers told us, “He was always quiet, listened well, and did everything asked of him. It would have been a pleasure to have a class full of students like Josh. It’s just a shame what’s happened to him since.”
Suffering from crippling anxiety and depression, Josh is a far cry from the bright spark he once was. While other, less capable students have gone on to lead successful lives, Josh is struggling to get out of bed in the morning.
“I don’t know why I’m like this,” he said. “It’s like there’s a fog in my brain and I just can’t get it to lift. Meanwhile, the kids who ate paste are loving life now.”
Scientists are currently researching if paste has nutritional properties which help simpletons develop into functioning adults.