Britain has declared that its citizens can expect to drink just another thousand cups of tea until Christmas Day.
The announcement has made Britain realise just how close Christmas truly is.
“Just a thousand cups of tea away? Blimey! That means I’ll need to start my Christmas shopping in 999 cups of tea time,” one man on the street told us.
While a woman said, “It feels like only yesterday that we were ten thousand cups of tea away from Christmas. It just comes around earlier every year.”
Cups of tea are the most commonly used time measurement in Britain, replacing the traditional “o’clock” system several decades ago.
For example, an Englishman might tell his friend that he is just two cups of tea away from getting smacked in the mouth if he keeps chatting shit.
While it is odd for a country to have its own unit of time, the United States has its own unit of measurement for distances. Rather than using imperial or metric, the US prefers to equate everything to the size of an American football field.