Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg has unveiled his latest innovation, a headset and earphones that completely block out the sound and sight of other people telling him to fuck off.
Zuckerberg demonstrated the impressive piece of technology in front of an audience of hundreds and encouraged them to insult him.
As the boos, catcalls and insults rained down on the harbinger of doom, Zuckerberg simply smiled as well as any robot can.
“As you can see, I’m completely unaffected thanks to this new device. We’re calling it the Shielded Headspace Integral Technology, or S.H.I.T. for short.
“This piece of S.H.I.T. will make you virtually immune to all forms of criticism, no matter how valid they are,” Zuckerberg told the audience.
While the S.H.I.T. did defend Zuckerberg against insults, it was less successful when people began to throw rocks at him. Several of the rocks drew blood – or at least some sort of black viscous liquid.
The S.H.I.T. will be available to purchase for just $4995/£4995 and access to your brainwaves.