You shot the sheriff? Five reasons you might as well shoot the deputy too

Did things get a little out of hand and now you find yourself with a smoking gun in your hand and a dead body in front of you?

Even worse, is that dead body the remains of a sheriff?

Right now you’re probably contemplating whether or not you should also shoot the deputy. We’re here to tell you that you absolutely should and here are five reasons why.


All cops are bastards and a deputy is a cop; therefore a deputy is a bastard. Why end your killing at one when you could double those numbers?

4. Leave no witnesses

There’s a good chance that when you shot the sheriff the deputy was a witness. Do you want to go to prison for the rest of your life? Hell no. Shoot the deputy and get away from the scene of the crime.

3. You’re probably saving a spouse from a beating

Sure, you might be taking away a father from his wife and children but did you know that 40% of cops are domestic abusers? You might just be doing them a solid.

2. You have bullets, use them!

Unless you spent your clip on the sheriff, you still have bullets in your gun. A munitions company has worked hard to make them so it would be both unethical and rude not to use them.

1. You’ll have something over Bob Marley

Bob Marley once shot a sheriff, as mentioned in his hit song “I Shot the Sheriff”; however, he did not shoot the deputy.

He died just eight years later. Coincidence? I doubt it. does not condone shooting sheriffs and/or deputies.

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