Queen Elizabeth II will begin her Christmas Day speech with a minute’s flatulence in way of a review of the past year, according to our sources.
The speech, which was pre-recorded in early December, will feature Queen Elizabeth II letting forth a potent gust of regal air for a full minute before she begins to speak.
It’s thought that the Queen ate a diet rich in baked beans and cruciferous vegetables for days before filming her message to build up the internal pressure to release such a long fart.
Royal experts claim that this is the most relatable the Queen has been for years.
“Let’s be honest, we all have a long fart built up in us after Christmas dinner,” one told us.
This year’s Christmas Day speech from Queen Elizabeth II will mark her 69th festive message. She will commemorate this particular achievement by saying “Nice!” and giggling a lot, as is tradition.